Guest Commentary

Dr. Pam Kohlmeier

Special to the East Washingtonian and Dayton Chronicle

Suicide has rocked my family. In memory of my child, Katie Thew, who battled chronic pain and died by suicide on Oct. 6, 2022, I offer this article to help other families avoid this grief.

Rampant mental health challenges including depression and anxiety, along with more and more communities recognizing they lack adequate resources to help when help is needed, inspired the creation of a month devoted to suicide prevention. Suicide Prevention Month (September) has just come and gone, and now our family is mourning another milestone, the two-year anniversary of Katie’s death.

According to the QPR Institute, suicide remains the most preventable cause of death. Let that sink in. Then I ask you to consider personally committing to doing something to help change that. Each of us can learn to recognize the signs and symptoms of a mental health crisis. If we recognize that someone is experiencing a mental health crisis, regardless of where we are in the U.S., we can call 988 to help save a life. While there are multiple courses that address suicide prevention, there is one entitled QPR (somewhat similar to CPR but limited to suicide prevention). QPR courses can be taken online or in-person. Information on QPR courses can be found online at https://qprinstitute.com/. If any organization in the community wants to host a QPR course, I am happy to volunteer to teach one. Taking a suicide prevention course like QPR can help to save the life of someone you love.

Learning about suicide prevention is key to reducing suicide rates in our community. While as an emergency physician, I am a proponent of Science Technology Engineering and Math (STEM) education, I also recognize that few young adults die because they somehow failed to learn calculus. And yet today, our education system prioritizes teaching high level math over basic psychology and life skills including coping strategies. As a parent who lost a child, I will attest that my child’s perfect math score on the SAT offered them zero protection against suicide and continues to offer me zero consolation from the pain of grief.

For anyone grieving the loss of a loved one by suicide, there is a support system available. Survivors Of a Loved One’s Suicide (SOLOS) support group meets every Tuesday evening at 323 S. Pines Rd. from 5:30-7pm in Spokane Valley at Hope Haven Counseling. It is a free support group that has helped many, including me. While it is normal to hope to never need a support group such as this, if you or someone you love has been touched by the debilitating pain of suicide, I highly recommend joining even though it is a bit of a commute. The website can be found online at

https://spokanesuicideprevention.org/events/survivors-of-a-loved-ones-suicide-support-group-solos/.

If you know a survivor struggling with grief, please encourage them to consider attending.

There are state and local organizations that also help support individuals and families affected by the challenges of mental illnesses and avoid the tragedy of suicide. The National Alliance on Mental Illness (commonly known as NAMI) has national, state, and some local branches to help individuals and their families learn how to understand and address the challenges of mental illnesses. Please consider visiting the state of Washington NAMI website at https://namiwa.org to learn more.

Even with solid organizations like NAMI, and helpful courses like QPR, suicide prevention remains challenging in our community. So, what can each of us do to help? We can become trained on how to help prevent suicides. We can push school boards to prioritize mental health education. We can demand healthcare systems improve access to mental health services. In short, we can -and must- learn how to support those who may not be able to help themselves.

Kohlmeier previously served as an emergency physician for the Providence SHMC pediatric emergency department, Lecturer for the Master of Public Health Program at Eastern Washington University, and Policy Manger for the Washington Medial Commission. Currently, Dr. Pam volunteers as a QPR Instructor for the Spokane Regional Health District’s Medical Reserve Corps, serves on the Board of NAMI-Spokane, and is a candidate for Washington State Representative in the 9th Legislative District for position 2.